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Invasive Species Returns to Walnut Grove

Walnut Grove, Minn.- Recent reports indicate that an invasive species that had been previously eradicated from Walnut Grove has returned to the vicinity.

Eliza Jane Wilder recently arrived in town to care for her ailing brother, Almanzo, recently struck with diphtheria and a stroke. However, in her typical fashion, Eliza Jane quickly inserted herself into every portion of the life her brother shares with his wife, Laura. While busy rooting herself in their lives, she also went to work spreading her ways around the town without consulting Laura and Almanzo first.

“One thing I’ve learned is that when one of these invasive species takes root, it’s almost impossible to get rid of them,” Charles Ingalls commented. “It’s like that one summer when we planted the spearmint. Next thing I know, it’s edging up on the carrot field. It was a lot of work getting rid of it, and even now you’ll see a little sprout up here and there.”

In a struggle of similarly epic proportions, Eliza Jane, who has previously demonstrated a great reliance on Almanzo, has invaded their lives on a scale previously unknown.

“I remember the first time it really hit me that something wasn’t right,” Laura tells us. “The Harve situation was really a red flag, looking back at least. At the time I was young and just excited that Almanzo and I could stop fighting long enough to get married. But really, I remember even before then when Bart Slater was driving her out of town–who knew what a favor that would have actually been, huh?–Almanzo said he would have to leave with her because he had a responsibility. They were both adults, so that was a little strange.”

Evidence suggests that Eliza Jane’s grip on Almanzo resurfaced with his recent vulnerability. “All of our progress went right out the window,” Laura tells us. “One bad illness and she becomes a total thorn. A thorn who spoon feeds my husband.”

In addition to the challenges wrought on Laura while her husband struggled to recover and she tended to an infant, Eliza Jane spread her plans all over town. 

“The worst part of it is that Eliza Jane is not a great customer for the Mercantile,” proprietor Harriet Olsen informs The Prairie Review. “The first time she almost left town she thought I was rude for asking her to simply pay her bill. Oh yes, yes, yes! It’s true! Imagine thinking you could skip town without paying cash for your bill.”

When asked for further comment, Charles Ingalls simply remarked that he had second thoughts about the plans he and Almanzo were following for the new house. “Maybe I should have used the plans I used for our little house,” said Charles. “I should just stick with what I know.”